the mittee； referring to your application for the post of
assistant mistress at the Wellingborough Green Schools。〃
It was very difficult for Brangwen to take in this remote and
official information； glowing as he was within the quiet of his
church and his anthem music。
〃Well； you needn't bother me with it now； need you？' he said
impatiently； giving her back the letter。
〃I've got to go on Thursday；〃 she said。
He sat motionless。 Then he reached more music； and there was
a rushing sound of air； then a long； emphatic trumpet…note of
the organ； as he laid his hands on the keys。 Ursula turned and
went away。
He tried to give himself again to the organ。 But he could
not。 He could not get back。 All the time a sort of string was
tugging； tugging him elsewhere； miserably。
So that when he came into the house after choir…practice his
face was dark and his heart black。 He said nothing however；
until all the younger children were in bed。 Ursula； however；
knew what was brewing。
At length he asked：
〃Where's that letter？〃
She gave it to him。 He sat looking at it。 〃You are requested
to call at the above offices on Thursday next〃 It
was a cold； official notice to Ursula herself and had nothing to
do with him。 So！ She existed now as a separate social
individual。 It was for her to answer this note； without regard
to him。 He had even no right to interfere。 His heart was hard
and angry。
〃You had to do it behind our backs； had you？〃 he said； with a
sneer。 And her heart leapt with hot pain。 She knew she was
free……she had broken away from him。 He was beaten。
〃You said； 'let her try；'〃 she retorted； almost apologizing
to him。
He did not hear。 He sat looking at the letter。
〃Education Office； Kingston…on…Thames〃……and then the
typewritten 〃Miss Ursula Brangwen； Yew Tree Cottage； Cossethay。〃
It was all so plete and so final。 He could not but feel the
new position Ursula held； as recipient of that letter。 It was an
iron in his soul。
〃Well；〃 he said at length； 〃you're not going。〃
Ursula started and could find no words to clamour her
revolt。
〃If you think you're going dancin' off to th' other side of
London； you're mistaken。〃
〃Why not？〃 she cried； at once hard fixed in her will to
go。
〃That's why not；〃 he said。
And there was silence till Mrs。 Brangwen came downstairs。
〃Look here； Anna；〃 he said； handing her the letter。
She put back her head； seeing a typewritten letter；
anticipating trouble from the outside world。 There was the
curious； sliding motion of her eyes； as if she shut off her
sentient； maternal self； and a kind of hard trance； meaningless；
took its place。 Thus； meaningless； she glanced over the letter；
careful not to take it in。 She apprehended the contents with her
callous； superficial mind。 Her feeling self was shut down。
〃What post is it？〃 she asked。
〃She wants to go and be a teacher in Kingston…on…Thames； at
fifty pounds a year。〃
〃Oh； indeed。〃
The mother spoke as if it were a hostile fact concerning some
stranger。 She would have let her go； out of callousness。 Mrs。
Brangwen would begin to grow up again only with her youngest
child。 Her eldest girl was in the way now。
〃She's not going all that distance；〃 said the father。
〃I have to go where they want me；〃 cried Ursula。 〃And it's a
good place to go to。〃
〃What do you know about the place？〃 said her father
harshly。
〃And it doesn't matter whether they want you or not； if your
father says you are not to go；〃 said the mother calmly。
How Ursula hated her！
〃You said I was to try；〃 the girl cried。 〃Now I've got a
place and I'm going to go。〃
〃You're not going all that distance；〃 said her father。
〃Why don't you get a place at Ilkeston； where you can live at
home？〃 asked Gudrun； who hated conflicts； who could not
understand Ursula's uneasy way； yet who must stand by her
sister。
〃There aren't any places in Ilkeston；〃 cried Ursula。 〃And I'd
rather go right away。〃
〃If you'd asked about it； a place could have been got for you
in Ilkeston。 But you had to play Miss High…an'…mighty； and go
your own way；〃 said her father。
〃I've no doubt you'd rather go right away；〃 said her mother；
very caustic。 〃And I've no doubt you'd find other people didn't
put up with you for very long either。 You've too much opinion of
yourself for your good。〃
Between the girl and her mother was a feeling of pure hatred。
There came a stubborn silence。 Ursula knew she must break
it。
〃Well； they've written to me； and I s'll have to go；〃 she
said。
〃Where will you get the money from？〃 asked her father。
〃Uncle Tom will give it me；〃 she said。
Again there was silence。 This time she was triumphant。
Then at length her father lifted his head。 His face was
abstracted； he seemed to be abstracting himself； to make a pure
statement。
〃Well； you're not going all that distance away；〃 he said。
〃I'll ask Mr。 Burt about a place here。 I'm not going to have you
by yourself at the other side of London。〃
〃But I've got to go to Kingston；〃 said Ursula。
〃They've sent for me。〃
〃They'll do without you；〃 he said。
There was a trembling silence when she was on the point of
tears。
〃Well；〃 she said； low and tense； 〃you can put me off this；
but I'm going to have a place。 I'm not going to
stop at home。〃
〃Nobody wants you to stop at home；〃 he suddenly shouted；
going livid with rage。
She said no more。 Her nature had gone hard and smiling in its
own arrogance； in its own antagonistic indifference to the rest
of them。 This was the state in which he wanted to kill her。 She
went singing into the parlour。
C'est la mere Michel qui a perdu son chat；
Qui cri par la fenetre qu'est…ce qui le lue renda〃
During the next days Ursula went about bright and hard；
singing to herself； making love to the children； but her soul
hard and cold with regard to her parents。 Nothing more was said。
The hardness and brightness lasted for four days。 Then it began
to break up。 So at evening she said to her father：
〃Have you spoken about a place for me？〃
〃I spoke to Mr。 Burt。〃
〃What did he say？〃
〃There's a mittee meeting to…morrow。 He'll tell me on
Friday。〃
So she waited till Friday。 Kingston…on…Thames had been an
exciting dream。 Here she could feel the hard； raw reality。 So
she knew that this would e to pass。 Because nothing was ever
fulfilled； she found； except in the hard limited reality。 She
did not want to be a teacher in Ilkeston； because she knew
Ilkeston； and hated it。 But she wanted to be free； so she must
take her freedom where she could。
On Friday her father said there was a place vacant in
Brinsley Street school。 This could most probably be secured for
her； at once； without the trouble of application。
Her heart halted。 Brinsley Street was a school in a poor
quarter； and she had had a taste of the mon children of
Ilkeston。 They had shouted after her and thrown stones。 Still；
as a teacher； she would be in authority。 And it was all unknown。
She was excited。 The very forest of dry； sterile brick had some
fascination for her。 It was so hard and ugly； so relentlessly
ugly； it would purge her of some of her floating
sentimentality。
She dreamed how she would make the little； ugly children love
her。 She would be so personal。 Teachers were always so
hard and impersonal。 There was no vivid relationship。 She would
make everything personal and vivid； she would give herself； she
would give； give； give all her great stores of wealth to her
children； she would make them so happy； and they would prefer
her to any teacher on the face of the earth。
At Christmas she would choose such fascinating Christmas
cards for them； and she would give them such a happy party in
one of the class…rooms。
The headmaster； Mr。 Harby； was a short； thick…set； rather
mon man； she thought。 But she would hold before him the light
of grace and refinement； he would have her in such high esteem
before long。 She would be the gleaming sun of the school； the
children would blossom like little weeds； the teachers like
tall； hard plants would burst into rare flower。
The Monday morning came。 It was the end of September； and a
drizzle of fine rain like veils round her； making her seem
intimate； a world to herself。 She walked forward to the new
land。 The old was blotted out。 The veil would be rent that hid
the new world。 She was gripped hard with suspense as she went
down the hill in the rain； carrying her dinner…bag。
Through the thin rain she saw the town； a black； extensive
mount。 She must enter in upon it。 She felt at once a feeling of
repugnance and of excited fulfilment。 But she shrank。
She waited at the terminus for the tram。 Here it was
beginning。 Before her was the station to Nottingham； whence
Theresa had gone to school half an hour before； behind her was
the little church school she had attended when she was a child；
when her grandmother was alive。 Her grandmother had been dead
two years now。 There was a strange woman at the Marsh； with her
Uncle Fred； and a small baby。 Behind her was Cossethay； and
blackberries were ripe on the hedges。
As she waited at the tram…terminus she reverted swiftly to
her childhood； her teasing grandfather； with his fa