ity controlled me and I began to think about my flaws in the preparation。 Then I realized that maybe my methods were not so effective and my English was still too poor。 I needed to cheer up and find another effective way of learning English。 I am not a person who gives up easily； “nothing is impossible” is my belief and I fully understand Rome wasn’t built in a day。
When I became a junior 3 student； I met Sara； a young and pretty lady from America。 She encouraged me to learn English by watching foreign movies。 I hesitated； for I was junior 3 then； bunches of things required time and energy to deal with。 But I couldn’t say no to her at the time she lent me six DVDs of Star Wars and urged me to try them。 She knew I love science so she chose the series for me； insisting that I was bound to love them。 Facing her passion； I had to accept them and brought them home。 I didn’t set finger to them till one night I got tired of the grammar excises and couldn’t go on； and then I recalled Sara’s encouragement； so I quickly turned on the puter and began playing the DVD。
I was fascinated by Star Wars。 Its plot and perfect pictures tightly grasped my heart。 For the first time I broke the strict discipline I had obeyed for more than two years； I went to bed unwillingly till the clock showed it was 12：40 at night。
From then on； movies became part of my life。 I watched them for about 1 hour every night。 Though I was crazy about it； I knew it is more important to remain sanity。 After all； I still had so much work to deal with； I couldn’t give up all the others for English。 I clearly know what I should do and always try my best to control myself； though sometimes I still lose control of myself。 For example； when I watched The Matrix during May Day holiday； I couldn’t stop watching it for 7 hours till the end。 Mom scolded me for watching too long even for learning English。 She warned me of progress in my Math； Chemistry and Physics； saying that I ought to spend more time on them since the exam of HSFZ is looming （took place on May 13th）。 I didn’t talk back because I knew I was too crazy about it to stop watching and I knew I was wrong。
Anyway； despite the fact that watching movies sometimes wears you out； I still consider it a wonderful way of learning English because it is far more interesting； lively and exciting than other ways of learning English。 But my advice is： doing so needs great self discipline。
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Exploration of the Matrix
Talking about my f*orite movie； definitely it is The Matrix。 There are three DVDs in all； and each of them lasts 3…4 hours。 When I first watched the first episode I could barely resist the impulse to finish it right away； and once I came to the last two； I totally indulged myself in it and finished it after a seven…hour watching。
I consider it to be an amazing film； no wonder some websites introduce students use The Matrix to improve both oral English and understanding of English； for it owns an extremely plex and confusing plot and significant dialogues。 In order to fully understand it； I took the trouble of taking down all the conversations on a note book； so I had to pause the film anytime to copy the subtitles。 Because of its plex story； I still had trouble understanding it。 The sentences of this movie are a play on words； which contain more than one meaning。
For example； I clearly remember at the beginning of the film； Mr。 Anderson； who is known to us as Neo； the chosen one； wasn’t aware of his special power。 One day he woke up； and a sentence “Follow the rabbit。” appeared on his screen ； a group of people turned out and asked him to join a party。 He wanted to refuse at first； but once he saw a rabbit tattooed on a woman’s arm who revealed it on purpose； he changed his mind at once。 Afterwards； he met his girlfriend Trinity。 It was when the real exciting story started。
How e the story happened later related to “rabbit”？ What does “follow the rabbit” mean？ The questions kept obsessing me and drove me to consult all the dictionaries I could find。 I reckoned “rabbit” may h*e the meaning of “clue” at first； but I failed to prove my own guess。 The dictionaries simply provided one explanation saying that it means “a *all long…eared animal that lives in a hole in the ground”。 “Rabbit” here absolutely had its unique meaning； and its general meaning “rabbit” had nothing to do with the plot。 This made me much more puzzled。
Not giving up easily； I called Brenda who is my another foreign teacher and asked her about this detail。 She chuckled on the other side of the line； saying： “Clara； think of a famous fiction named ‘Alice’s Adventures in Wonderland’； how did Alice get to wonderland？” After a long pause of silence； I yelled in excitement： “That rabbit！ Alice was taken to wonderland by a rabbit！” “You got it！” said Brenda。 “Now do you know the other meaning of ‘follow the rabbit’？” “Yeah” answered I hastily； “It hinted that Neo was going to be led to the true world and know his real identity and destiny。”
Besides this part of The Matrix； there are several parts using this fiction to pun on words。 For instance； when Neo was introduced to meet Morpheus； Morpheus showed him two pills； one red； and the other blue。 “Take the blue pill； and you wake up on your bed tomorrow and believe every thing you believe； take the red one； I’ll show you how deep the rabbit hole is。” The words above was quoted from the film； and the last sentence of Morpheus implied that he would tell Neo the truth about the world they lived which was a virtual wonderland created by puters； and the machines had taken control of the world for a long time。 Obviously； “rabbit hole” refers to truth here。
Further more； the names in this film are significant； too。 The one that named the characters apparently wanted to show us with some clues through these deliberately chosen names。 Take “Morpheus” for an example。 It is the name of god of the dream from classical legends。 The name “Trinity” also has its own religious meaning。
Unfortunately； Brenda left abruptly with the three DVDs I lent her； so I could not keep the film。 My only memory for The Matrix is my note…book that contains almost all the conversations of it。 I treat it as my priceless treasure。
The first TOEFL class
Saturday； July 28； 2007
The courses of TOEFL iBT finally began after I had expected it for such a long time。 The first thing I got to do is to get new books。 When Ellen and I went into a *all room near our classroom and showed the woman in charge of our listening certificate； our hands were full of loads of books in an instant moment。 There were seven huge and thick books including a series of four books for the four sections in TOEFL iBT； an advanced skill practice for the iBT； an official guide and a preparation course for TOEFL iBT； plus more than 30 CDs； it would certainly make you in despair。 But the motto of the New Oriental is “Hew out of the mountain of despair a stone of hope and you can make your life a splendid one。” “OK； I will try；” I thought。 “But you h*e to tell me how； do you？”
The teacher who taught our spoken English is John； a talkative； humorous man with a look a little like foreigners。
In class； he taught us how to make through independent speaking task and also encouraged students to speak before the class on some chosen topics。 I don’t know what I was afraid of； for most of the class spoke much more poorly than I did。 But still； I didn’t dare to stand up and say： “John； can I h*e a try？” Now I am aware of my fault； ： wanting to be perfect is not wrong； but one should not let the thought block one’s way。 Stopping talking because of being afraid of making mistakes surely guarantees you a nonmistake performance； but fluency in English is bound to be a daydream for you。
The next day at the same time； again John asked us to answer the question： “Should film or television be censored or should we be free to choose what we like to see？ Express your opinion and include details in your explanation。” I stood up br*ely and spoke aloud before the whole class。 I said that although censorship keeps vulgarity and violence away from children； it deprives children’s ability of judging for themselves。 Also in a country； abusive censorship may be used by some people to manipulate viewers’ values。 After my speech； there was an explosion of applause which instilled content and confidence into my body。
Now I know that you never lose by trying； you only lose by holding back。 From now on； I will wipe off my shyness and be a person full of self…confidence。
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Future warrior
Wednesday； August 01； 2007
These days I was extremely depressed because of two reasons： one is that I found my English level was way too far from TOEFL； the other is that time is not under my control。
The goal I set up for myself is to get at least 100 points in TOEFL iBT which is a great mark acknowledged by the public for the students who major in English。 Further more； the emphasis on munication in an academic setting makes it more difficult and challenging than the previous versions。 Therefore； my level seems