to memory。
〃Were you hunting this weekend； with Emmett？〃 I asked when it was quiet
again。
〃Yes。〃 He paused for a second； as if deciding whether or not to say
something。 〃I didn't want to leave； but it was necessary。 It's a bit
easier to be around you when I'm not thirsty。〃
〃Why didn't you want to leave？〃
〃It makes me… anxious… to be away from you。〃 His eyes were gentle but
intense； and they seemed to be making my bones turn soft。 〃I wasn't
joking when I asked you to try not to fall in the ocean or get run over
last Thursday。 I was distracted all weekend； worrying about you。 And
after what happened tonight； I'm surprised that you did make it through a
whole weekend unscathed。〃 He shook his head； and then seemed to remember
something。 〃Well； not totally unscathed。〃
〃What？〃
〃Your hands；〃 he reminded me。 I looked down at my palms； at the
almosthealed scrapes across the heels of my hands。 His eyes missed
nothing。
〃I fell；〃 I sighed。
〃That's what I thought。〃 His lips curved up at the corners。 〃I suppose；
being you； it could have been much worse — and that possibility tormented
me the entire time I was away。 It was a very long three days。 I really
got on Emmett's nerves。〃 He smiled ruefully at me。
〃Three days？ Didn't you just get back today？〃
〃No； we got back Sunday。〃
〃Then why weren't any of you in school？〃 I was frustrated； almost angry
as I thought of how much disappointment I had suffered because of his
absence。
〃Well； you asked if the sun hurt me； and it doesn't。 But I can't go out
in the sunlight — at least； not where anyone can see。〃
〃Why？〃
〃I'll show you sometime；〃 he promised。
I thought about it for a moment。
〃You might have called me；〃 I decided。
He was puzzled。 〃But I knew you were safe。〃
〃But I didn't know where you were。 I —〃 I hesitated； dropping my eyes。
〃What？〃 His velvety voice was pelling。
〃I didn't like it。 Not seeing you。 It makes me anxious； too。〃 I blushed
to be saying this out loud。
He was quiet。 I glanced up； apprehensive； and saw that his expression was
pained。
〃Ah；〃 he groaned quietly。 〃This is wrong。〃
I couldn't understand his response。 〃What did I say？〃
〃Don't you see； Bella？ It's one thing for me to make myself miserable；
but a wholly other thing for you to be so involved。〃 He turned his
anguished eyes to the road； his words flowing almost too fast for me to
understand。 〃I don't want to hear that you feel that way。〃 His voice was
low but urgent。 His words cut me。 〃It's wrong。 It's not safe。 I'm
dangerous； Bella — please； grasp that。〃
〃No。〃 I tried very hard not to look like a sulky child。
〃I'm serious；〃 he growled。
〃So am I。 I told you； it doesn't matter what you are。 It's too late。〃
His voice whipped out； low and harsh。 〃Never say that。〃
I bit my lip and was glad he couldn't know how much that hurt。 I stared
out at the road。 We must be close now。 He was driving much too fast。
〃What are you thinking？〃 he asked； his voice still raw。 I just shook my
head； not sure if I could speak。 I could feel his gaze on my face； but I
kept my eyes forward。
〃Are you crying？〃 He sounded appalled。 I hadn't realized the moisture in
my eyes had brimmed over。 I quickly rubbed my hand across my cheek； and
sure enough； traitor tears were there； betraying me。
〃No；〃 I said； but my voice cracked。
I saw him reach toward me hesitantly with his right hand； but then he
stopped and placed it slowly back on the steering wheel。
〃I'm sorry。〃 His voice burned with regret。 I knew he wasn't just
apologizing for the words that had upset me。
The darkness slipped by us in silence。
〃Tell me something；〃 he asked after another minute； and I could hear him
struggle to use a lighter tone。
〃Yes？〃
〃What were you thinking tonight； just before I came around the corner？ I
couldn't understand your expression — you didn't look that scared； you
looked like you were concentrating very hard on something。〃
〃I was trying to remember how to incapacitate an attacker — you know；
selfdefense。 I was going to smash his nose into his brain。〃 I thought of
the darkhaired man with a surge of hate。
〃You were going to fight them？〃 This upset him。 〃Didn't you think about
running？〃
〃I fall down a lot when I run；〃 I admitted。
〃What about screaming for help？〃
〃I was getting to that part。〃
He shook his head。 〃You were right — I'm definitely fighting fate trying
to keep you alive。〃
I sighed。 We were slowing； passing into the boundaries of Forks。 It had
taken less than twenty minutes。
〃Will I see you tomorrow？〃 I demanded。
〃Yes — I have a paper due； too。〃 He smiled。 〃I'll save you a seat at
lunch。〃
It was silly； after everything we'd been through tonight； how that little
promise sent flutters through my stomach； and made me unable to speak。
We were in front of Charlie's house。 The lights were on； my truck in its
place； everything utterly normal。 It was like waking from a dream。 He
stopped the car； but I didn't move。
〃Do you promise to be there tomorrow？〃
〃I promise。〃
I considered that for a moment； then nodded。 I pulled his jacket off；
taking one last whiff。
〃You can keep it — you don't have a jacket for tomorrow；〃 he reminded me。
I handed it back to him。 〃I don't want to have to explain to Charlie。〃
〃Oh； right。〃 He grinned。
I hesitated； my hand on the door handle； trying to prolong the moment。
〃Bella？〃 he asked in a different tone — serious； but hesitant。
〃Yes？〃 I turned back to him too eagerly。
〃Will you promise me something？〃
〃Yes；〃 I said； and instantly regretted my unconditional agreement。 What
if he asked me to stay away from him？ I couldn't keep that promise。
〃Don't go into the woods alone。〃
I stared at him in blank confusion。 〃Why？〃
He frowned； and his eyes were tight as he stared past me out the window。
〃I'm not always the most dangerous thing out there。 Let's leave it at
that。〃
I shuddered slightly at the sudden bleakness in his voice； but I was
relieved。 This； at least； was an easy promise to honor。 〃Whatever you
say。〃
〃I'll see you tomorrow；〃 he sighed； and I knew he wanted me to leave now。
〃Tomorrow； then。〃 I opened the door unwillingly。
〃Bella？〃 I turned and he was leaning toward me； his pale； glorious face
just inches from mine。 My heart stopped beating。
〃Sleep well；〃 he said。 His breath blew in my face； stunning me。 It was
the same exquisite scent that clung to his jacket； but in a more
concentrated form。 I blinked； thoroughly dazed。 He leaned away。
I was unable to move until my brain had somewhat unscrambled itself。 Then
I stepped out of the car awkwardly； having to use the frame for support。
I thought I heard him chuckle； but the sound was too quiet for me to be
certain。
He waited till I had stumbled to the front door； and then I heard his
engine quietly rev。 I turned to watch the silver car disappear around the
corner。 I realized it was very cold。
I reached for the key mechanically； unlocked the door； and stepped inside。
Charlie called from the living room。 〃Bella？〃
〃Yeah； Dad； it's me。〃 I walked in to see him。 He was watching a baseball
game。
〃You're home early。〃
〃Am I？〃 I was surprised。
〃It's not even eight yet；〃 he told me。 〃Did you girls have fun？〃
〃Yeah — it was lots of fun。〃 My head was spinning as I tried to remember
all the way back to the girls' night out I had planned。 〃They both found
dresses。〃
〃Are you all right？〃
〃I'm just tired。 I did a lot of walking。〃
〃Well； maybe you should go lie down。〃 He sounded concerned。 I wondered
what my face looked like。
〃I'm just going to call Jessica first。〃
〃Weren't you just with her？〃 he asked； surprised。
〃Yes — but I left my jacket in her car。 I want to make sure she brings it
tomorrow。〃
〃Well； give her a chance to get home first。〃
〃Right；〃 I agreed。
I went to the kitchen and fell； exhausted； into a chair。 I was really
feeling dizzy now。 I wondered if I was going to go into shock after all。
Get a grip； I told myself。
The phone rang suddenly； startling me。 I yanked it off the hook。
〃Hello？〃 I asked breathlessly。
〃Bella？〃
〃Hey； Jess； I was just going to call you。〃
〃You made it home？〃 Her voice was relieved… and surprised。
〃Yes。 I left my jacket in your car — could you bring it to me tomorrow？〃
〃Sure。 But tell me what happened！〃 she demanded。
〃Um； tomorrow — in Trig； okay？〃
She caught on quickly。 〃Oh； is your dad there？〃
〃Yes； that's right。〃
〃Okay； I'll talk to you tomorrow； then。 Bye！〃 I could hear the impatience
in her voice。
〃Bye； Jess。〃
I walked up the stairs slowly； a heavy stupor clouding my mind。 I went
through the motions of getting ready for bed without paying any attention
to what I was doing。 It wasn't until I was in the shower — the water too
hot； burning my skin — that I realized I was freezing。 I shuddered
violently for several minutes before the steaming spray could finally
relax my rigid muscles。 Then I stood in the shower； too tired to move；
until the hot water b