ed; like the bad halfpenny; or as ifSalem were for me the inevitable centre of the universe。 So; onefine morning; I ascended the flight of granite steps; with thePresident's mission in my pocket; and was introduced to the corpsof gentlemen who were to aid me in my weighty responsibility; as chiefexecutive officer of the Custom…House。 I doubt greatly… or; rather; I do not doubt at all… whether anypublic functionary of the United States; either in the civil ormilitary line; has ever had such a patriarchal body of veteransunder his orders as myself。 The whereabouts of the Oldest Inhabitantwas at once settled; when I looked at them。 For upwards of twentyyears before this epoch; the independent position of the Collector hadkept the Salem Custom…House out of the whirlpool of politicalvicissitude; which makes the tenure of office generally so fragile。A soldier… New England's most distinguished soldier… he stood firmlyon the pedestal of his gallant services; and; himself secure in thewise liberality of the successive administrations through which he hadheld office; he had been the safety of his subordinates in many anhour of danger and heartquake。 General Miller was radicallyconservative; a man over whose kindly nature habit had no slightinfluence; attaching himself strongly to familiar faces; and withdifficulty moved to change; even when change might have broughtunquestionable improvement。 Thus; on taking charge of my department; Ifound few but aged men。 They were ancient sea…captains; for the mostpart; who; after being tossed on every sea; and standing up sturdilyagainst life's tempestuous blast; had finally drifted into thisquiet nook; where; with little to disturb them; except theperiodical terrors of a Presidential election; they one and allacquired a new lease of existence。 Though by no means less liable thantheir fellow…men to age and infirmity; they had evidently sometalisman or other that kept death at bay。 Two or three of theirnumber; as I was assured; being gouty and rheumatic; or perhapsbed…ridden; never dreamed of making their appearance at theCustom…House during a large part of the year; but; after a torpidwinter; would creep out into the warm sunshine of May or June; golazily about what they termed duty; and; at their own leisure andconvenience; betake themselves to bed again。 I must plead guilty tothe charge of abbreviating the official breath of more than one ofthese venerable servants of the republic。 They were allowed; on myrepresentation; to rest from their arduous labours; and soonafterwards… as if their sole principle of life had been zeal for theircountry's service; as I verily believe it was… withdrew to a betterworld。 It is a pious consolation to me; that; through my interference;a sufficient space was allowed them for repentance of the evil andcorrupt practices; into which; as a matter of course; everyCustom…House officer must be supposed to fall。 Neither the front northe back entrance of the Custom…House opens on the road to Paradise。 The greater part of my officers were Whigs。 It was well for theirvenerable brotherhood that the new Surveyor was not a politician; and;though a faithful Democrat in principle; neither received nor held hisoffice with any reference to political services。 Had it beenotherwise… had an active politician been put into this influentialpost; to assume the easy task of making head against a Whig Collector;whose infirmities withheld him from the personal administration of hisoffice… hardly a man of the old corps would have drawn the breath ofofficial life within a month after the exterminating angel had e upthe Custom…House steps。 According to the received code in suchmatters; it would have been nothing short of duty; in a politician; tobring every one of those white heads under the axe of theguillotine。 It was plain enough to discern; that the old fellowsdreaded some such discourtesy at my hands。 It pained; and at thesame time amused me; to behold the terrors that attended my advent; tosee a furrowed cheek; weather…beaten by half a century of storm;turn ashy pale at the glance of so harmless an individual as myself;to detect; as one or another addressed me; the tremor of a voice;which; in long…past days; had been wont to bellow through aspeaking…trumpet; hoarsely enough to frighten Boreas himself tosilence。 They knew; these excellent old persons; that; by allestablished rule… and; as regarded some of them; weighed by their ownlack of efficiency for business… they ought to have given place toyounger men; more orthodox in politics; and altogether fitter thanthemselves to serve our mon Uncle。 I knew it too; but could neverquite find in my heart to act upon the knowledge。 Much anddeservedly to my own discredit; therefore; and considerably to thedetriment of my official conscience; they continued; during myincumbency; to creep about the wharves; and loiter up and down theCustom…House steps。 They spent a good deal of time; also; asleep intheir accustomed corners; with their chairs tilted back against thewall; awaking; however; once or twice in a forenoon; to bore oneanother with the several thousandth repetition of old sea…stories; andmouldy jokes; that had grown to be passwords and countersigns amongthem。 The discovery was soon made; I imagine; that the new Surveyor had nogreat harm in him。 So; with lightsome hearts; and the happyconsciousness of being usefully employed… in their own behalf; atleast; if not for our beloved country… these good old gentlemen wentthrough the various formalities of office。 Sagaciously under theirspectacles; did they peep into the holds of vessels! Mighty wastheir fuss about little matters; and marvellous; sometimes; theobtuseness that allowed greater ones to slip between their fingers!Whenever such a mischance occurred… when a waggon…load of valuablemerchandise had been smuggled ashore; at noonday; perhaps; anddirectly beneath their unsuspicious noses… nothing could exceed thevigilance and alacrity with which they proceeded to lock; anddouble…lock; and secure with tape and sealing…wax; all the avenuesof the delinquent vessel。 Instead of a reprimand for their previousnegligence; the case seemed rather to require an eulogium on theirpraiseworthy caution; after the mischief had happened; a gratefulrecognition of the promptitude of their zeal; the moment that therewas no longer any remedy。 Unless people are more than monly disagreeable; it is myfoolish habit to contract a kindness for them。 The better part of mypanion's character; if it have a better part; is that which usuallyes uppermost in my regard; and forms the type whereby I recognisethe man。 As most of these old Custom…House officers had good traits;and as my position in reference to them; being paternal andprotective; was favourable to the growth of friendly sentiments; Isoon grew to like them all。 It was pleasant; in the summerforenoons… when the fervent heat; that almost liquefied the rest ofthe human family; merely municated a genial warmth to theirhalf…torpid systems… it was pleasant to hear them chatting in the backentry; a row of them all tipped against the wall; as usual; whilethe frozen witticisms of past generations were thawed out; and camebubbling with laughter from their lips。 Externally; the jollity ofaged men has much in mon with the mirth of children; the intellect;any more than a deep sense of humour; has little to do with thematter; it is; with both; a gleam that plays upon the surface; andimparts a sunny and cheery aspect alike to the green branch; and grey;mouldering trunk。 In one case; however; it is real sunshine; in theother; it more resembles the phosphorescent glow of decaying wood。 It would be sad injustice; the reader must understand; torepresent all my excellent old friends as in their dotage。 In thefirst place; my coadjutors were not invariably old; there were menamong them in their strength and prime; of marked ability andenergy; and altogether superior to the sluggish and dependent modeof life on which their evil stars had cast them。 Then; moreover; thewhite locks of age were sometimes found to be the thatch of anintellectual tenement in good repair。 But; as respects the majority ofmy corps of veterans; there will be no wrong done; if I characterisethem generally as a set of wearisome old souls; who had gatherednothing worth preservation from their varied experience of life。They seemed to have flung away all the golden grain of practicalwisdom; which they had enjoyed so many opportunities of harvesting;and most carefully to have stored their memories with the husks。They spoke with far more interest and unction of their morning'sbreakfast; or yesterday's; to…day's; or to…morrow's dinner; than ofthe shipwreck of forty or fifty years ago; and all the world's wonderswhich they had witnessed with their youthful eyes。 The father of the Custom…House… the patriarch; not only of thislittle squad of officials; but; I am bold to say; of the respectablebody of tide…waiters all over the United States… was a certainpermanent Inspector。 He might truly be termed a legitimate son ofthe revenue system; dyed in the wool; or; rather; born in thepurple; since his sire; a Revolutionary colonel; and formerlycollector of the port; had created an office for him; and appointedhim to fill it; at a period of t
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